Vulnerable

Looking back over my collection of letters to you… gosh, I've been at this for over two years now. Two years, declaring my love for you, time and time again… but, not to you, never actually to you. Just to the endless void, and a handful of kind strangers.

If you somehow magically stumbled upon this cache… or even if you haven't, but have seen it in my eyes every time I look at you…

I hope you know… I think you know… It's not fear of being vulnerable that's holding me back, not now, not anymore. I'm ready to be open to you, let you read me like a book. I have been prepared, for at least a year now, to show you my soul, bare my heart to you, to just let this endless river of love flow from me to you, unslowed by any oxbow, unhindered by any dam.

I shed my fear of being vulnerable to you long ago.

But I think you know why I haven't told you, why instead I do my best to simply show you… A million words spoken in single tiny acts, here, there, everywhere… Any chance I get, any chance you give me.

I hope I've gotten better at it. Because even if I can't tell you… even if these invisible walls… walls that part of my soul is constantly railing against… even if these walls completely block out the sound of my voice…

I need you to hear. I need you to know that I love you.

I love you, ⭐️.

And I hope I'm able to tell you someday, and soon. Might break down one day and do so anyways, despite the walls.

Yours, entirely,
♒️